If Only

If only I could see you once
And store your faces in my mind
A part of my own self to see
For I gaze in the mirror, and yet I'm blind!

If only I could meet with you
To talk to you would help me heal
Unlock the door of my self-doubts;
Explain the ways I think and feel.

If only I could understand
The reasons why it could not be...
If for unknown reasons, you "gave me away"
Or if love for me cause you to set me free?

If only I could talk to you
I'd have so much I'd want to say!
I'd thank you for giving a part of yourself
To those who helped form who I am today.

If only I could see you once...
The people who gave me being.
I want to abandon the blinders I've worn
And finally focus on seeing.

© Jennifer A. Eick-Jakiela